Friday’s Fascinations: Cake, Crime, and Crisis

It’s been a long week, guys. Let’s break it down.

For one, Ace of Cakes is now on Netflix! Ace of Cakes is a show that was on the Food Network a couple of years ago and was very popular, about a guy named Duff Goldman who makes crazy, awesome, unbelievably realistic and whimsical cakes, including some that even have electronic elements to them like lights, sound, movement, rockets and fireworks. Saying that his company Charm City Cakes makes the greatest cakes you’ve ever seen is an understatement. They just do really phenomenal work, along with having a good time doing so, making their TV show entertaining and even educational to a certain extent. I used to watch the show when it was on TV a couple years back and I was in my Chef phase of career goals. So, if you have Netflix and are interested in a good time, Ace of Cakes is where it’s at.

While we’re on the topic of Netflix, they have introduced a new series available exclusively on Netflix called Daredevil. However, I’m not interested in talking to you about that (yet). What I want to talk to you about is the song in the trailer of the series, a song called “Beautiful Crime” by Tamer. As Sherlock says, “the clue is in the name” as the song is beautiful. I find it to be a song about what it’s actually like being a superhero and the difficulty in the action of being a superhero, and that it might not be as romantic as it seems. Whether you like superheroes or just chill, profound music, then this song is definitely worth a listen.

Lastly for this week I feel the need to explain a little bit of what I’m currently going through, as that has been the most overwhelming thing I have been thinking about lately. I explained in a couple posts (“Plot Twist”, “Lost and Insecure-You Found Me”) that I am going through it with my very first existential crisis (aww). While it is something that I’m sure everyone goes through, for me at least, that doesn’t make going through it any easier. When I bring it up, people immediately say “everyone goes through it you’re fine.” You’re right, I am actually fine, and there is rarely a moment when I forgot how lucky I actually am, even getting to go through an existential crisis because I feel that is something that is so first world of me. I mean, I get the ability to define my life on my terms, instead of having to worry about my own survival because I’m lucky enough to have parents who have taken pretty good care of that for me. And while I realize all of this, it doesn’t really make it easier to go through, funny enough. I have always been under the impression that everybody’s got problems, whether that be deciding what you’re going to actually do with your life or how you’re going to put food on the table, everybody’s problems feel big and important to them, so just let them go through it instead of shame them and say “at least you’re not starving”. Again, you’re right, I’m not. But counting my lucky stars every thirty seconds doesn’t actually fix my other problems. *steps off soapbox*

Anyway, that’s not where I meant to go with that; the writing just took me there. What I actually wanted to talk about is the fact that I am starting to want to talk about this existential crisis of mine (the first month I cried just about every time I attempted to talk about it or think in depth about it). So you’ll probably be hearing more about this in upcoming posts, because the best way for me to work out my thoughts is by writing about it, as you do.

So that’s that. Sorry for the random rant, but that’s just how I feel. Regardless, I hope you have a lovely week!

Lost and Insecure-You Found Me

I feel so lost. I have been sitting here, at my desk in front of my laptop, trying to figure out what to say and the words, they just don’t come. In a big way, I feel this is a metaphor for my life at the moment, sitting in front of my laptop waiting for some sort of answer as to what I should do, but all that seems to happen is that I just stay seated here, not moving forward or backwards. Just not moving at all. And there is not a more frustrating feeling than staying completely still day in and day out. Feeling as if you’ve lost all passion. Just feeling kind of hollow, as if everything you once loved is the body of a distant life, far removed from the life you now call yours. And you say you still have passion because you remember how much you loved that life that was once yours, but you can’t seem to summon that passion now when you need it the very most. And what was once in perfect order has fallen out of alignment. Because when it rains, it pours, and everything seems to fall down, and you know it will take twice as long to figure out how it’s supposed to go back together again than it ever did to fall apart to begin with because the glass pieces have shattered in the fall.

With no real hobbies, no surefire career, or even life, goals, the remains of a shattered and lost religion, it’s hard to find a good, and unemotional, place to start. So I write, because it is the only answer I have. Writing. It is the only hobby I have, the only god I can bring myself to subscribe to. The only thing that feels as abstract as it feels concrete. The best form of expression I have, as well as my most potent weapon. The one act I will always know is my greatest strength. As lost as I may feel, writing seems to be the only thing I always feel certain about. This place is one of the few that offers consistent relief, even if it is the desire to write for a living that got me here in the first place.

My real dilemma is finding a way to step forward, a way to leave this cycle of uncertainty and the fogginess of being lost. All I really want is to feel that fire of passion within me again. But every avenue I’ve searched down left me bored, unfeeling. And the more avenues I search down to no avail, the more I feel disheartened and the harder it begins to seem that I will find what I’m looking for in any near expanse of time. Time reveals, they say, but how many years will I have wasted before the ever-present figure decides to shine its wise light upon my path. How long will I stand still here on this dark, unlighted path before the moonlight will shine down upon the path before me and a trail of stars will guide my way? Who even knows how many paths surround me, if I can’t see any of them? Standing still is a jail cell all its own. I just need some way to see one of them so I can walk down it, for now at least.

I’m sure this sounds like some sort of pity party, and I promise you it’s not. I just feel very, very uncertain of anything really regarding my life, except for my ever-present schoolwork. And I’ve just never felt so uncertain about so many things at once, and I hope I can find my way out of this phase sooner rather than later, but I cannot know. All I can hope for is that I find something meaningful and exciting to grab onto that might lead me to where I’m going.

Friday’s Fascinations: RB is Back!

Quote of the Week: “Worse things happen at sea” -Cressida Bonas

After a couple weeks off, I’m back! And I’ve got some serious ground to cover, as there has been a lot of cool stuff going on in entertainment while I’ve been away. Let’s not waste a second more.

First of all, can we talk about Troye Sivan? For those unaware, Troye Sivan is a South African/Australian 19 year-old made famous by his roles in movies such as the X-Men franchise and his ship with YouTuber Tyler Oakley (#Troyler), as well as his own YouTube channel. As if that’s not enough, he also has an EP out called TRXYE, and while it only has five songs on it, it is one of my favorite albums of all time. All the songs are so beautiful and they literally soundtrack my life. The production of all of them is really cool, the messages are interesting, as they’re not all straight-forward, cutesy pop love songs, and they are good for thinking and dancing, which is more than I would I feel polite asking for.

Sticking with the YouTube vibe, my friend Taylor recently turned me on to the YouTube channel JacksGap. Well back on, I should say. I knew about JacksGap before Taylor told me to watch Jack Harries’, along with his identical twin Finn Harries, channel. I had even watched some of their videos before, but it had been awhile. In revisiting their channel, I had rediscovered a whole treasure trove of cool, inspirational videos such as Following Heart: Shark Conservationist, a series about women following their dreams and this particular episode is about a woman who lives and works in the Bahamas as a Shark Conservationist, and the Rickshaw Run videos, a four-part series where Jack and Finn along with a couple of other British vloggers take part in a tuk-tuk-driving marathon across India over a three-week period, and it is sure to excite the thrill-seeker in anyone.

Last, but not least, this week my alma mater is putting on The Addams Family: The Musical, and I’m stoked. I would qualify this musical as a part of my top three (with Pippin and Sunday in the Park with George, of course). When I saw it this last summer at the Muny, I was genuinely surprised by how much I liked it; it just made me remember how much I love the Addams family and how quirky and funny and passionate they are. Plus, the music in the musical is unbelievably catchy and dance-y in that perfectly theatrical way. I love it.

So that’s this week then. Until next time, I hope you have a lovely week!

Plot Twist

And so, the girl who thought she would become a journalist decided one day that maybe that life was not for her, but then is not sure what she actually would like to do.

Yes, hi, that’s me, your Residential Blonde.

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve posted anything and I figured you guys deserve an explanation as to why. What’s been going on is that I have been having an existential crisis of sorts, which began a couple weeks ago when I suddenly thought that I don’t think journalism is the road I actually want to go down. This came as I realized that I am unhappy, and I think journalism might be a big part of that.

So no, I don’t know what I might do instead, but I know that I do still like to write so I will do my best to continue Friday’s Fascinations and other little blog posts here and there.

So that’s it really. I hope you guys have a great week!